Tony

Tony
My brother in law Tony helping the poor

Sunday, June 26, 2011

Honk if you're a "Bad" Mother!

The other night I was going through some old photos.  Some time ago I compiled a collection of pictures of each of my children.  The hope was that I would be like one of those "good" mothers and put them in a fancy scrapbook with neat little sayings and cute little stickers.  But apparently I'm not one of those "good" moms.  In fact, this morning while we were all out to breakfast after church I picked up this little book to browse through with my family while we were eating.  The title read: "Why I Love My Son".  It had all these really touchy-feely sayings on different pages from various moms to their sons.  At first I thought, "how cute, maybe this will be a good way to tell me sons how I feel about them," then I read the third quote out loud:  "I love you son because I can trust you to always make good choices and the right decisions....." I looked up from the book at my 2 teenage boys and exclaimed, "this is stupid, apparently this mom has NO idea how to raise kids!"  They both laughed.

The truth is, I have never been one of those really good moms.  I tell my kids the truth when they are no good at a sport or don't try hard enough, I swear at them when they leave their dirty dishes on the counter or talk back to me, and once I even took a swipe at my son with a knife in my hand (don't worry, he got away).  I don't have hours of footage of my kids little league games, or birthdays, or scrapbooks with their adorable little faces smiling up at me, or even a bumper sticker that reads, "My Son is an Honor Student at THS."  Those are all the things that I guess "good" mothers have.  But I think I do have something other moms might not, I have a relationship with my kids.  We talk about everything, we play games (even poker!), and I do go to all their sports games (almost).  I couldn't be happier with them.  They are great kids with realistic views on life.  The don't expect a pat on the back every time they do the right thing, and they don't expect to be paid for good report cards, and most important, they don't even mind.

The truth is, I would rather be a "bad" mom and take that time I would have spent cutting out pictures and pasting them in books and spend it playing basketball or soccer with my boys. If I had tried to be the perfect mom I know I would have failed. I am too realistic and pragmatic for that.  I wish my boys the best but I still expect the worst.  Summer for most moms who are at home can seem like a lifetime, but for me it is going by in a blink of an eye.  I enjoy every minute with them...even if THEY can't wait to for school start!

I hope I do it better with my grandchildren than I did with my own kids, but until than, honk if you're a bad Mom too!